How to cope with sibling rivalry
From ArticleWorld
To Cope with Sibling Rivalry is one of the commonest problems that parents of growing up children face almost everyday of their life. Most parents want to have their children playing happily together, not fighting, and pulling each other’s hair or name calling. Unfortunately, for most parents this does not happen. There are many ways to cope with sibling rivalry.
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A few thumb rules
- Remember it is more about the children and you than between them. They think that they are competing for your affection, so be sure to be fair in settling fights and respectful of their feelings or you will be doing more harm than good.
- Children are still in the process of becoming social beings and they usually experiment with their new ways on each other, so be patient.
- Teach them to share, it is one of the most important things that you will be teaching them which will stay with them for life.
- Be very clear about what behavior is and what behavior is not acceptable at home. Teach them to say please and thank you and to play quietly while the baby takes a nap while making quite clear that name-calling, tattling, hitting, pushing, punching, kicking, etc is just not on.
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Do’s
- Each child is different and reacts differently to situations. Value this individuality and encourage them to be independent instead of trying to mold them into what you think they should be like.
- Encourage the children to be affectionate to each other, do not force the affection but if there is a pattern to their fights involve them in some constructive activity ( like eating or bathing) when the time for their daily fights draws near.
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Don’ts
- Do not ever compare one child with the other, remember they are competing for your affection, and preference of one child over the other, for even a small thing shatters their belief and makes them resent each other.
- Don’t give labels, like a neat girl, the baby, the big boy - it soon develops into name calling.