How to bond with your father after divorce

From ArticleWorld


To Bond with Your Father after Divorce becomes a very dicey business, especially if he is beginning life again with a new partner. It calls for a balanced mixture of hard work, sensitivity as well as compromise. The relationship could be rebuilt, step by step, some of which are enumerated below.

A few suggestions

  1. The first thing to remember is that, just like you, your father has also gone through some pretty big changes in his life and is now trying to build his life all over again; he may take time because now he has new commitments to new relationships.
  2. You could start by thinking of all the things that you would like to do with him but take care that they do not intrude too much in the new life that he is starting. It would serve a better purpose to make a list of all the things and sort them in their order of priority.
  3. Remember that his new life and his new partner have their demands on his time and try not to make him feel guilty about neglecting you.
  4. This means that you continue with the same, one to one relationship as you had with him before his divorce (with as much time as he can spare) and do not make unreasonable demands on him to test his love for you vis-à-vis his new family.
  5. When you make plans with your father to do things together, please ensure that you include his new family also (if they are willing) in your plans. Maybe then you could also make a few plans to do things that include just the two of you.

Do’s

  • Be patient and don’t give up without trying. Always look at every situation from the other’s point of view also.
  • Be open to do things with his new ‘family’, it will help you both bond better.

Don’ts

  • Don’t ever become abusive and have arguments with your father about how things should be and what went wrong, it never solves any problems.
  • Don’t lose patience, things may not be the same between you and your father now but things have a way of coming right in the end, somehow, just give it time.